When golf course maintenance driver Ned Green was run over by his golf ball retrieval machine, he figured that was his end. But modern medical science was able to put this Humpty-Dumpty back together again, more or less.
Green’s picker clogged on the driving range, and he had to get out to clear it. Unfortunately, his handbrake turned out to be in need of replacement, and he was ‘picked’ himself, to the horror of onlookers and the course’s insurance agent. 37 surgeries later, all but 2 of them on his mangled genital area, Green is picking up the pieces of his life.
‘I can do little chores around the house,’ he said, ‘but whenever the Roomba comes toward me, I grab my groin and cry.’
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