A long-haul driver has found a genius loophole for spreading holiday cheer (and a little chaos): covering his entire truck and trailer in flashing, synchronized Christmas lights – then claiming they’re “DOT-approved emotional support lighting” under the new mental wellness initiative.
“These aren’t decorations,” the driver told a confused trooper. “They’re therapeutic illuminance modules. Science. Look it up.”
The truck, which now resembles Santa’s sleigh after a Red Bull overdose, has been spotted lighting up weigh stations, truck stops, and at least one unsuspecting Denny’s. Passersby report feeling “both happier and slightly electrocuted.”
The driver insists his rolling light show qualifies as federally protected mental health gear.
“Every time I feel sad, I press the ‘Festive Mode’ button. It plays Mariah Carey and shoots glitter from the air vents.”
Some fellow truckers have followed suit, adding disco balls to their cabs and installing mood-sensitive LEDs that flash red when dispatch calls.
So far, DOT officers are baffled. One inspector reportedly burst out laughing before admitting, “Technically… there’s no rule against decorating your fifth wheel like a rave.”
Industry insiders warn this may trigger a trend:
- One flatbed driver mounted a life-sized inflatable elf family and claimed it reduced his idle time.
- Another team driver added a disco light to improve “vibe compliance.”
The FMCSA (allegedly) responded by putting out a quiet reminder: “Please don’t blind traffic with 7,000 lumens of cheer.”
But until new rules are posted, emotional support lights are sweeping the nation – one glittering 18-wheeler at a time.
“I haven’t felt this mentally stable since the fuel card worked on the first swipe,” the driver said, gently polishing a glowing ornament mounted above his CB mic.
*All articles on this website are crafted with human creativity and a touch of AI-inspired humor. These stories are entirely fictional, written purely for fun and entertainment, and should not be taken as factual or advice. Keep smiling and stay safe! And remember – don’t read while driving; tune in to our podcast instead 🙂
