Saying that it was ‘time to get out of the 12th century,’ Santa Claus announced today that he will no longer deliver toys by reindeer sleigh and employ a big airborne rig instead.
“Comet, Cupid, and the rest have served me well,” said Mr. Kringle from his brand-new 9,000-bay warehouse, “but modern times call for modern methods. That’s why I’ve switched to this sweet candy apple red slope-nose with an 80-foot dry van trailer. It’s a Volvo because Sweden’s as close to buying local as I can manage up here. Plus, they were able to modify it for me to withstand the 3000 F heat of re-entry.”
Watching as his elves painted the trailer like a giant candy cane, he added, “The special engine runs on children’s Christmas wishes. If I had to put diesel in it at today’s prices, there’d be a lot of empty stockings, I’m afraid.”
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