Embark Trucks, an organization developing advanced technology that will allow for self-driving semi-trucks, recently published a study that showed that its vehicles successfully completed a trip in inclement weather 9 times out of 10. While it may initially appear like positive research, it’s important to consider the fine print on page 42. Directly below the “Non-Important Legal Terms – Don’t Read” header, the study gives insight into the 10% of failures by the autonomous semis. Multiple vehicle accidents occurred on all occasions in which the semi-truck could not complete its journey.
When asked about the worrisome gravity of such failures and how they compromise the lives of other drivers, CEO Alex Rodrigues claimed that “we don’t live in a perfect world.” The accidents, he claimed, “weren’t at all the semi-trucks fault.” He has been questioned by police multiple times for his involvement in the accidents. Still, He has always escaped with his defense that cars are vehicles that can control themselves and their emotions. “It’s sad, really is,” he said at a trucking conference. “But in the end, we must position our trucks to be the best trucks they can be. They need to feel empowered to make a difference in this world.”
Ongoing research into autonomous cars is scheduled to continue, while Embark Trucks is reportedly moving its headquarters to Texas “where the weather isn’t ever bad enough to cause accidents.” Upon the news of this move, thousands of Texans left the state, and the state’s politicians immediately passed an order to relicense all drives with a safety course on “How to Avoid a Rogue Autonomous Semi-Truck” for a flat rate of $35 per person.